That’s Not a Beer in my Pocket, Dad…I’m Just Really Happy to See You…?

I have a very unique relationship with deception. If you are looking for evidence of this—which I am sure you all are because I am just such an interesting individual—ask any female I have ever had any “relationship” with. Now you may be saying to yourself, “O brother, not another lying man, what a pig!” However, you would be dead wrong because, on the contrary, I am brutally honest—a trait which gets me in just as much trouble as lying—trust me! I wasn’t always doomed to a permanent residence in every female’s “doghouse” due to my brutal honesty. Conversely, when I was a young little Mathew, I was a deception fiend. I lied about everything from saying it was my brother who urinated in the tire swing to saying it was my brother who urinated on the patio furniture—I guess I had a fascination with urinating on things but evading blame. All the lying finally caught up to me and my guilty conscience, creating the honest man writing this blog for you today. My brutal honesty does not go over well with the ladies, but it does provide for wonderfully applicable stories concerning communication theory, deception, and media selection. So here goes…
One faithful high school night, I felt like “balling out”—like the youth these days call it—and planned on bringing some brewskies for my boys. Not really putting much thought into the plan, I just tried to stroll out the front door with my tense grin and my incredibly unsuspicious giant plastic bag clanging and jangling full of beer. As you could imagine, I didn’t get very far before my father, the much honored Bruce Lloyd Birnbaum, asked, “Uh…..Whatcha got there Matt?” Immense beads of sweat swelled up on my brow and began falling to the ground like hundreds of miniature, moist, bombs. Excuses and ideas began flying through my extremely nervous teenage mind like: Just say they are Snapple bottles and run for it; you can take this old man! As my mouth began to move in accordance with my voice box to say this wonderfully crafted lie, there must have been some malfunction within my brain. What came out of my mouth sounded more like, “It’s…BEER!” To make a long story short, I was NOT the beer supplier that faithful high school night. My inability to effectively deceive my father can be attributed to the form of media involved in the interaction. In accordance to O’Sullivan’s Impression Management Model (IMM), I would have preferred to select a leaner medium to increase ambiguity opposed to a richer medium. In my situation, the locust—self—and the valence—negative because of underage drinking—would, according to the hypothesized interaction effect, support my preference of a more mediated channel of communication. Perhaps, if I was able to interact with my father’s inquiry of the contents of my “beer bag” through a leaner, more mediated channel of communication, I would have made it successfully to my friend’s house, with the “goods.” Luckily for my dad, I had not taken this class yet or known about O’Sullivan’s IMM, so the score board reads: DAD: 1, Matt and COMM 245: ZERO!
Another instance where media selection can be beautifully instrumental is…the Booty Call, yes, I said it. I don’t care who wants to admit it or not, many of us have been on both the initiating and receiving end of the beloved booty call. Based on personal experience, I would say that the preferred method of communication concerning booty calls are text messages opposed to richer mediums such as FtF or phone calls. This media selection situation epitomizes the Media Richness Theory (MRT) which asserts that there should be an optimal match between the equivocality of the communication task and the richness of the medium. Frankly put, the less equivocal the message, the leaner the medium could be. What intended message could be less equivocal than, “Get over here, I want to Kiss you.” Since the communication tasks related to booty calls are very simple and uncomplicated, most people choose the lean medium of text messaging to carry out the interaction. If you don’t believe me or agree, the next time you are lonely on a late weekend night, try walking to your “friend’s” door and asking face to face, “Want to be used?”