I was actually quite pleased with this assignment, because one of my most important relationships, that with my boyfriend, originated online, as dorky as it sounds. We started dating in high school, but this most likely wouldn't have happened without the help of AIM. My boyfriend was at the time in a band with one of my friends, and we met through this mutual friend. I first saw my boyfriend at one of their performances playing the drums, and wasn't initially interested (simply because he looked too angry when he was playing his drums). However, we began talking online, and because our relationship developed primarily online in the beginning and then moved to FtF, I think my experiences apply to the Hyperpersonal theory quite well.
Because we met and allowed our friendship to develop through this environment, I was able to disclose more personal information to him because the medium acted as a buffer for me in my much more timid days, and we got to know each other on a personal level without any factors other than our conversation and self-disclosure getting in the way. In other words, this was consistent with the "reallocation of cognitive resources" and "selective self-presentation" aspects of the Hyperpersonal theory, because we were able to focus all of our "cognitive resources" on getting to know each other personally without letting any other social or physical pressures get in the way, and we were also able to selectively self-present and disclose certain information about ourselves that we thought would make us more appealing to the other, which was I'm sure a factor that led to our interest in progressing our relationship to FtF.
Additionally, the developmental aspect played a key role in our relationship because we really did spend a lot of time talking online before we spent time together in person, and once we did so, we felt extremely comfortable together, as if we had known each other forever even though we had never actually hung out. Our time spent getting to know each other through online interactions really did prove effective in that I didn't feel any major shock or surprises about any aspects of my boyfriend after we met in person; the online interactions really were sufficient in letting us get to know one another.
I also think that over-attribution played a role in our initial relationship because we were allowed to selectively self-present our best qualities, and all our resources for getting to know each other were allocated to the information that the other gave us. For example, I know that I over-attributed his intelligence and humor, but also noticed, upon reflection, that behavioral confirmation played a role here too, in that he in a way rose to this role for a while, and while all these self-presentational methods began to fade as we became more intimate throughout our relationship, there was never any severe disappointment or shock in not living up to any expectations or anything like that.
So overall, I think that the beginning stages of my relationship with my boyfriend apply well with the Hyperpersonal theory in its progression from a virtual relationship to a non-virtual relationship because of the way that all of the Hyperpersonal factors played a role in our initial online interactions and how, over time, we got to know each other just as well, if not better, in the less-threatening online environment as we would had our relationship been strictly FtF all along.
Comments:
http://comm245green.blogspot.com/2007/11/11-modality-switching-hits-little-too.html
http://comm245green.blogspot.com/2007/11/11-being-yourself-pays-off.html
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3 comments:
Typically, the hyperpersonal model leads to negative impressions during a modality switch because selective self-presentations are revealed and dissappointement ensues. It's interesting that your account led to a positive impression. I wonder why that is. Perhaps the fact that you saw him first in FtF and the fact that your friends who knew him could tell you about him affected your impression of him as well. In any case I'm glad it worked out for you.
Emily I find your story so interesting because it relates to closely to a story that I actually posted for this week. Even down to the theories providing positive impressions rather than negative. Also as I stated in another post some of the most supportive and interesting people I have ever met I first met online. Although in this world I as a male tend to feel "safer" meeting online friends in person, it is still possible as we see here when done carefully. I think its awesome everything worked out for you and again I am fascinated that it sounds so close to my actually newest friendship developed online and then in ftf.
Emily,
It's interesting that the hyperpersonal model worked toward your advantage. I was surprised to read that "selectively self-presenting" could be such an advantage overall. I think that your situation also didn't necessarily comply with Ramirez & Wang’s discussion, but I think it may be a good situation to research? How often can the hyperpersonal model result in positive face-to-face interactions? Could it be your initial sighting of him in all of the face-to-face vulneribility softened your perception of him and possibly didn't allow him to use selective self presentation in such an extensive way?
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